You - A Pleasant Fantasy or an Enigmatic Fiction?

Have I told you too much about myself - more than my own good? Have I opened up too much to you- so much so that when necessity arises, I won't be able to close up? Have I let myself be intertwined with your life to the extent that there's no way back? I have always believed in keeping an escape route....every time I visit a palace/ a castle, what attracts me is the ingenious way they always plan an escape route - a secret path which probably would go on for miles and open up far far apart - much much away from the centre of attention.
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Am I wrong? – Have I committed any mistake? - Have I started expecting too much from life? - Have I stopped being a realist? I Hope not. Whether something actually works out or not - I guess I will look back lovingly at this time - these few days - months - maybe years - as probably one of the best time of my life. Just do not know why, but looking back now, I do not even know whether I got what I wanted, ‘cause I simply did not know what I was looking for. Maybe, just a dash of pleasure, just a pinch of pain - a longing strong enough to numb my senses.... Maybe I never really had any expectation from you – or maybe I simply had so much expectation that I was probably too afraid even to acknowledge, I really do not know what actually happened.
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Some day I will get over you. Not that I would want to, just that maybe I would need to know how to exist without you. Not that I would remove you from my mind – you would always exist like one of the best scenes viewed through my eyes – like first drops of rain over water lilies, like the reflection of the first rays of sun over the snow-clad peaks of Kanchanjunga – like a walk through a hilly road adorned with rhododendron bows. Your presence, your fragrance will exist as one of the best feelings ever experienced in my lifetime –even more thrilling than that of - India winning the Cricket World Cup, my favourite soccer team winning an international competition, my first reading of The Fountainhead or maybe Scorcese or AR Rahman winning the Academy Award. But no - I won’t despair then just because you are far apart, I won’t anguish because of the emotional distance, I won’t wallow just thinking of the past, I won’t let myself be killed softly and feel every emotion of mine get destroyed because you have unknowingly inflicted a pain on me. Some day I will learn to be oblivious of your present and just dwell on the past… some day I will simply be able to be nostalgic and yet not suffer.

Till then I probably shall float over the waves of life, flowing with the current – induced by your radiant, intoxicating presence. But as of now, to tell you the truth, I have no qualms in admitting – I am actually enjoying it!!

Signed and Sealed by John Galt.

and P.S - I Love You.

One in Hand is much better than.....

I just realized that when we do possess something, we hardly understand/ realize its importance. We try to run away from it and try looking for greener pastures. We tend to believe that we are not dependent on anything and that nothing possibly can bind us down forever. After all, we are the masters of our own destiny, we are as free as the bird s– it hurts our ego to admit that maybe what we have is indeed something extremely important to us and that probably our life is incomplete without it. In order to simply prove the fact that we are above mere mortal bindings, we sometimes deliberately demean those precious gems of our lives.

However, only when we lose what we had, we understand the gravity of that thing in our life – then we tend to look back longingly and loathe ourselves for not grabbing every opportunity to enjoy it as long as it was with us. This is and has been an age old phenomenon – we enjoy regretting – we enjoy looking back at the past and wallowing. At other times, we try to look at the future and dread. Seldom do we enjoy the present, just forgetting about the past and future completely and basking in the glory of the gorgeous 'current' circumstances. And that is precisely why we can identify so much with the tragic epics, novels and movies 'cause we tend to believe that it has resemblance with the tragedy which hits our lives. Whereas the truth is that we do not enjoy things to its fullest when we have it since our mind, at that point of time is busy with something else and then when it dawns on us, what we have done, it is already too late and that the moment has passed – and precisely at that point of time our life gets filled with tragedy- so in short we deliberately invite tragedy into our lives, by never remaining contended .

It is like this – when we have a person with us, we hardly find time to spend a few moments with him/her, talk to the person, just soak up life with him/her – tell him/ her how special he/ she is to us and that without him/her our lives would have been so incomplete. It is only when that the person vanishes from our lives, that we realize what a blunder we have committed – then we regret why we had missed any opportunity to let the person know our feelings about him/ her. But when such realization dawns on us, it is already too late. So, to any one who can relate to what I spoke for so long, even remotely, please go, enjoy your life to the fullest and don’t let ego stand in your way of professing your love and gratitude to the people who actually matter in your life, cause you never know, this may be the last opportunity you get to let the person know your feelings about him/her. Just because today you have everything you need, does not mean tomorrow you will remain the same powerful, all-conquering person as you are today – everyone has to bend his/her back one day – so why not start doing it voluntarily instead of getting hit a hundred times on the spine and then get forced to bow down? – There’s still time, people, not everything is lost – go ahead, let nature take its destined path, let your heart show you the way and consider every day to be a Thanksgiving Day …….Let peace and satisfaction prevail upon you.....

Signed and Sealed by the Galt, John Galt.

Wish List

Signed and Sealed by the Galt, John Galt.

The 'mature' boy who never grew up!!

Michael Jackson died of a heart attack 12 hours ago....End of an era - end of five decades of pop and dance - rock and roll - end of thrills and dangers and history!!! Even though he implored us to beat it, he himself could not....No longer shall we be enthralled by the moonwalks and robot moves...

The Peter Pan of the music world has returned perpetually to his Neverland....

Dear Jackie, we, the people, who have followed your music, (love it or hate it, I must say we never ignored it) however, have just one regret - we will never know whether you died a man or a woman [:P], a white or a black, with a nose or without a nose!!! Come on, you should have at least cleared our doubts before you died - and as you were in life, you will still remain in death - an enigma!!!

R.I.P Michael - Moonwalk your way to heaven!!

Signed and Sealed by the Galt, John Galt.

P.S - If any of you want to write an essay titled "The Autobiography of Michael's nose", you can get materials here.

The girl

Today at New Market I saw THE MOST BEAUTIFUL GIRL I have ever seen in my life!! I can use as many words to describe her beauty by saying it was – sublime, splendid, resplendent, dazzling, stunning, glorious, ravishing ,etc etc - but I guess no amount of wordplay would be enough to actually portray the quantum of her beauty. She was beautiful, PERIOD.

Looking at the soft white skin of her face, I wondered whether her face had been cast with molten butter. The few strands of hair which were visible seemed to be chosen from the rarest of rare oriental silks and gleamed in the neon light of the Market. Her wide, expressive eyes seemed to look at things with the wonder of a new born child – Ahh I again re-iterate, I can never forget her face.

Her beauty wasn’t that kind of beauty that I would like to own or conquer or trample or even look at for a long time… it is like those things which you would want to admire from far apart and then let the memory soothe your senses. It is like the snow-laden peaks of the Everest which I would rather gaze at with a sense of awe and disbelief rather than tread on and summit it and then gloat at my menial achievement. The same reason I do not support the commercial tourism to Moon. Too much proximity destroys the mysticism. There are some mysteries best left unsolved, some feelings best left un-described, some questions best left unanswered and there are some beauties best left untouched, unpolluted.

Don’t get me wrong, I ain’t those nerdy boys who study in boys’ school and then go to a missionary college at the far end of the world and spend the waking hours of the day immersed in books, getting perfect scores in examinations – in such a scenario if I had laid my eyes on any girl, I would have been overwhelmed. I have always been to co-educational institutions, I have travelled a bit, I have seen thousands of movies and sitcoms which cast the most splendid women from around the world, have been on and off crushes and had my fair share of friends from the ‘fair’er sex. Even after such a decently wide outlook, I still maintain that she was the most beautiful amongst all women I have ever laid my eyes on. A good analogy would that be of the Afghan girl – even though thousands of pictures of war ravaged women have made it to the covers of newspapers or periodicals, one can never forget the gleaming, haunting eyes of Sharbat Gula.

Well, coming back to the topic, She was standing in front of a New Market garment shop with a deep longing in her eyes, eyeing an exquisite satin turquoise/ olive blue (I do not remember the exact colour) dress. The angst in her eyes was so heart wrenching, that for a moment I felt like buying it then and there and presenting it to her – I wouldn’t even mind if she didn’t know who gave her the dress, I just wanted her to have it – to see her doe-eyes fill with glee.

Till now, I have not disclosed the most essential part of the girl – she was a Muslim girl – maybe 22-23 years old and when other girls of her age were using swanky cosmetics, experimenting with bold dresses and presenting an uber-cool look, she was wearing a pre-historic apparel like a burqa! Even though she was wearing the burqa, her face was visible because she had not drawn the veil – it seemed as if she was in a dilemma, she was at a juncture, she was like Janus – undecided whether to look back or look forward. Thus even though she could not disregard her religious sentiments by not wearing the burqa, she wanted the world to see her amazing face and her kohl-laden eyes.

You all must be thinking that I probably stared at her for an hour or something [J]. I must say, on the contrary, I was in a hurry to reach my office and probably glanced at her for a few seconds. I guess, she realized that her longing for the dress was palpably visible and became conscious – since as soon as our eyes met, she gave a shy, almost apologetic smile followed by a poignant sigh which probably would translate to this “Alas, the dress is not for me to wear, at least not in this lifetime” which kind of made me wish, if only she could muster up the courage to question the foolish traditions of the society like Marji of Persepolis.

That was it, and I just carried on my way and she hers without a word exchanged, yet I could not help but end the post with some assistance from good ole’ Wordsworth –

“Her innocent beauty in my heart I bore,
Long after she was seen no more.”

Signed and Sealed by John Galt.

Bloggers

I cannot claim that I am an avid blog reader/ follower/ writer. In fact, I would rather write volumes of pages on - things I think, issues I hold dear and aspects that I am completely against - on my mental diary. I have always wanted to 'write' a diary, but the fear that it will bind me into a routine has so far prevented me from maintaining a proper hard bound diary. There's no 'Dear Kitty' in my life, so far.

Even though I admit, I am not an avid blog reader, my recent forays into public blogging has forced me to read blogs of a few people - I have found their writings quite exhilarating to say the least. In my limited experience, I have mainly seen two kinds of bloggers - the writers and the compilers.

The first variety are the proper authors, with literary flair - who paint captivating pictures with their words and if not forever, at least for a few minutes make significant forays into your heart. They normally have fascinating entries - but their blogs are not necessarily very attractive to look at - I mean they probably feel it is better to display their creativity through their words rather than a fascinating get-up. The flip side is - once these people have the writer's block, it is difficult to bring them out of their shell and sometimes for days you do not get posts updated on their blogs - no amount of prodding and pushing - coaxing or threatening - can make them post something. Well, however when they post, their words do take us to a magic world and these magicians, with a tiny flick of their wands, can fill your life with infinite glee or simply bring tears to your eyes with the pathos in their words.

The other variety are the compilers. These people are the more active types - they scout blogs, read them, post long comments, keep encouraging the 'writers' and most importantly choose the best of the posts from the people of the first variety and post them on their blogs. I will cut off my tongue and feed it to the dogs if I say that these people are not creative. They are creative - totally - in their own right. They are the talent scouters - it is these people who motivate the first variety of bloggers to rush back home from work to post their thoughts on their blogs. The 2nd variety also have the most brilliant get-up in their blogs and have mind-boggling pictures chosen from God-knows-where, posted on their sites. Sometimes I just look at their blogs with wide eyes and gaping mouth, wishing if only I had been born with a slightly more 'active' creative side.

Well, then there is the third variety like me - who are the silent observers - who are nothing but parasites - they do not have the self-belief to post things on their blog, nor have the energy or inclination to post some encouraging comments on others' blogs. They are the scourge of the blog world and the only contribution they have is to hike up the bloggers' site meter count :). (Well, at least some involvement we have - I was already feeling bad about myself :P.

Signed and Sealed by John Galt.

I am miffed and I protest!!

No one reads my blog [:)] - Even if they read, they do not comment – I have even allowed anonymous commenting – still no response – Even spammers have decided to give my blog a slip . Out of the 10 odd comments made on my blog, 7 are probably by me - it is almost like I am conversing with myself - how pathetic is that [:(]. If no one is reading the public blog, then I might as well stop writing here and continue with my own personal diary and maybe later, it will follow the footsteps of Anne Frank and get published as “The Diary of John Galt” (btw, that’s me). I am sad and have a good mind to just stop posting here…

Aaah! Finally a looming storm!!

Some of you may think that I like violence, destruction and obliteration - but I must say, I am in general a peace loving guy - and could spend hours just watching trees swaying in the horizon against a clear blue sky. But, given the heat and humidity that we have been subject to during the past fortnight, even a harmless guy like me has been reduced to praying for a thunderstorm. The Aila, which came with a refreshing promise of an early monsoon, went away with a whimper - leaving us behind to bear the atrocities of the inhumane weather.

Sometimes, I feel that our monsoon department is paid simply to lie. Cause out of the 100 predictions made by them, 90 of them prove to be wrong. There is a funny joke wrt this.

Once a meeting was being held at New Delhi where the meteorological departmental heads of all the 28 states were invited. At the meeting, the Kolkata office head was lambasted left and right. "Mr. X, you represent an office which is the headquarter of Eastern India and yet everyday your office makes all the wrong predicitons. Because of your antics, our department has been reduced to a joke. Look at the Bhubaneshwar office - your neighbours with a similar climate - they are such a small office with minimal infrastructure, yet their predictions are always spot on. Shame on you." The Kolkata chief listened to all the admonishments with his head held low. However, at the end of the meeting, when he was going out with a heavy heart, he suddenly saw the Bhubaneswar chief waiting for a lift. He immediately caught hold of the guy, took him to a corner and asked him, "Man, can you please tell me your secret. It is amazing that I try my best, yet cannot come up with a single correct prediction and you get each of them right - what the hell is your secret?" The Bhubaneshwar guy, with a sheepish grin, replied, "Sir, you know that we have no equipments and we are a fairly new office. How can we make predictions based on our equipments? We follow a simple technique- Every morning I open the newspaper, look at the Kolkata office's predictions and just announce the exact opposite of that to be the weather for that day. Believe, it or not Sir, this technique works prefectly." The Kolkata chief was speechless to say the least, at such a candid confession.

Well, finally I can smell the petrichor, I am excited... maybe a storm is looming- maybe it is going to rain - I cannot be too excited cause I remember the Ghanan Ghanan scene from Lagaan. Poor people, after wasting so much energy in singing, prancing and dancing, they had to finally bear the heart-break of watching the rain clouds float away to another pasture....They could have might as well, waited for a few more hours instead of starting off the pre-mature celebrations. What idiots!!!!

No No - the petrichor wasn't a false alarm, my senses were not betraying me.. it has finally started raining - ahhh sweet rain, come drench me with all your chill and wetness and wash away my fatigue.... After all, as mentioned by the Leds -

"Upon us all a little rain

Must fall.

Just a little rain?"

P.S - Just as I was about to publish this, lightening struck (literally) and my net connection conked out.... I had to wait for 14 more hours before I could finally post this, by which, the weather is back to its sweltering best...so much for the effectiveness of the storm....

BUT I DO LOVE YOU

I don't like to be alone in the night
And I don't like to hear i'm wrong when i'm right
And I don't like to have the rain on my shoes
But i do love you
But I do love you
I don't like to see the sky painted gray
And i don't like when nothings going my way
And i don't like to be the one with the blues
But i do love you
But i do love you
Love everything about the way your loving me
The way you lay your head up on my shoulder
When you sleep
And i love to kiss you in the rain
I love everything you do
Oh i do
And i don't like to turn the radio on just to find
I missed my favorite song
And i don't like to be the last thing to lose
But i do love you
But i do love you
Love everything the way your loving me the way you lay
Your head up on my shoulder when you sleep
And i love to kiss you in the rain
But i do love you but i do love you!

Hmmm... let's listen to some additional inputs from people about this useless four letter word [:)]...

"I don't pretend to know what love is for everyone, but I can tell you what it is for me; love is knowing all about someone, and still wanting to be with them more than any other person, love is trusting them enough to tell them everything about yourself, including the things you might be ashamed of, love is feeling comfortable and safe with someone, but still getting weak knees when they walk into a room and smile at you.”

“Pure love is a willingness to give without a thought of receiving anything in return.”

“You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.”

“In the silence of night I have often wished for just a few words of love from someone, rather than the applause of thousands of people.”

“For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.”

“I don't wish to be everything to everyone, but I would like to be something to someone.”

“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love.”

“Love is when you shed a tear and still want him, it's when he ignores you and you still love him, it's when he loves another girl but you still smile and say I'm happy for you, when all you really do is cry."

“Love isn't finding a perfect person. It's seeing an imperfect person perfectly.”

“I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I am with you.”

“It hurts to love someone and not be loved in return, but what is the most painful is to love someone and never find the courage to let the person know how you feel.”

“If I never met you, I wouldn't like you. If I didn't like you, I wouldn't love you. If I didn't love you, I wouldn't miss you. But I did, I do, and I will.”

“I'm not supposed to love you, I'm not supposed to care, I'm not supposed to live my life wishing you were there. I'm not supposed to wonder where you are or what you do...I'm sorry I can't help myself, I'm in love with you.”

“Love me when I least deserve it, because that's when I really need it.”

Too idealist, mushy, bullshit, what crap, awww, so sweet - I am expecting a variety of reactions from people.... and then there are some who probably won't react at all cause they think that the word is not that important to even worth a mention....

Which one of these do you conform to? Have you ever felt like this, even once in your life?

As for me, my take on this gets summed up brilliantly underneath-

"Rehna Tu, Hai Jaisa Tu, Thoda Sa Dard Tu, Thoda Sukun -

Tujhe Badalna Na Chahoo, Ratti Bhar Bhi Sanam,
Bina Sajawaat, Milawat, Na zyadaa, Na hi Kum -
Tujhe Chahoon Jaisa Hain Tu......"

Random Updates

• I am never referred in any one else’s blog and hence I have decided not to refer about anybody in particular from now on, unless absolutely necessary. This is my abhimaan – you know what, I have long tried to find a perfect English translation of the word – abhimaan – none of vanity, pride, self-esteem, dignity, amour proper or egotism actually completely capture the emotion of abhimaan. Which led me to wonder – do Englishmen never feel abhimaan – Is this a typically Indian phenomenon? God knows…......For, those who still do not understand what the word means, try catching up a brilliant movie of the same name, boasting timeless songs like - Tere Mere Milan Ke Yeh Raina.
  

• Have a lot of things to do – have to respond to quite a few job applications – updating one’s CV is so painful…L

• I started a community on Orkut 3 years back- and how it has flourished! It now possesses more than 1000 members. They keep meeting up and having a great time. Even though I am invited a lot to these meetings, I have not attended any of their real life meetings and am admonished repeatedly for that J. But, it’s ok, I’ll live.

• Today was unusually hot and humid in my city – it was simply unbearable… It is much better in the evening, though.

• I got two great books and two big bars of Dairy Milk – Fruits and Nuts Milk Chocolate as gifts. The books were highly recommended and am looking forward to finishing them soon.

• I think I have become too dependent on Microsoft Word. I can type continuously for pages on this particular software, but it feels odd even to write 3-4 pages at a stretch using the good old pen n paper.

• Roger ‘Fedex’ Federer became the sixth man on the planet to complete a career Grand Slam. Kudos to him and to his undying stamina. Leander Paes is God – at 35, he still retains the energy of a 10 year old kid. His men’s French Open Title was well deserved.

• The cricket T-20 World Cup has begun. The Netherlands pulled off an amazing victory over hosts England the other night. India lived up to their expectations as world beaters by clinically decimating minnows, Bangladesh.

• Jenson Button is on the dream run of his life on the Brawn machine in Formula 1 this season. After struggling for years to find a foothold in the Schumacher, Alonso and Hamilton dominated circuit, he has finally come to his own. Same can be said of the manufacturers. Never has in the history of Formula 1, a new entrant to the circuit has dominated their maiden season in such a manner. Amazing, Ross – you are the man.

• Little sister is coming home after a few months – even though her train is late by a cool 11 hours.

• I think we should invite people over to our place more often, cause unlike normal circumstances, am actually enjoying the food being prepared at our house for the last two days. I can only attribute the improvement in taste, to the visit of my aunt and cousins.

• Am having a great time, chatting late into the night with them. Last night we chatted for close to 5 hours straight upto 4 AM. After years of teasing my women friends, because of the glee they derive from bitching, I finally realized, bitching is quite fun and stress-busting J.

Currently, listening to the songs of this new Bengali Movie called Madly Bangali.

Hey, That's No Way To Say Goodbye - Leonard Cohen

I loved you in the morning, our kisses deep and warm,
your hair upon the pillow like a sleepy golden storm,
yes, many loved before us, I know that we are not new,
in city and in forest they smiled like me and you,
but now it's come to distances and both of us must try,
your eyes are soft with sorrow,
Hey, that's no way to say goodbye.

I'm not looking for another as I wander in my time,
walk me to the corner, our steps will always rhyme
you know my love goes with you as your love stays with me,
it's just the way it changes, like the shoreline and the sea,
but let's not talk of love or chains and things we can't untie,
your eyes are soft with sorrow,
Hey, that's no way to say goodbye.

I loved you in the morning, our kisses deep and warm,
your hair upon the pillow like a sleepy golden storm,
yes many loved before us, I know that we are not new,
in city and in forest they smiled like me and you,
but let's not talk of love or chains and things we can't untie,
your eyes are soft with sorrow,
Hey, that's no way to say goodbye.

Am listening to a lot of Leonard Cohen these days along with my customary dose of country, rock, pop, classical, blues etc etc - basically I don't have a taste - as exclaimed by many.. :) - Well, what to do, I keep disappointing people, who do not expect me to know everything :P.... Hope to post something on my favourite songs soon enough - Keep watching this space...

A life well spent.....

When you are at the autumn of your life, what would make you feel that you have had a great and satisfying life so far? For me, I would consider my life well spent, if people around me retain at least the same affection for me as they have now, forty years down the line. Cause at the end of it, that is all that matters. One dialogue from the film – The Curious Case of Benjamin Button goes like this – “Would you still love me if I were old and saggy?” I say- in Beatles lingo, and this goes out to the people who REALLY matter to me and for whom I matter even a tiny bit,

“Will you still need me
Will you still feed me
When I'm sixty four?”

June-bug

I started this blog in mid May and posted approximately 16 gibberish posts in 15 days. I finally realized that I was overdoing it. Come on, after all even I am a responsible tax-paying citizen, is it right to exasperate you all with these incessant, irritating posts? Hence, I decided to take a much-needed break or should I say, in IPL lingo, a strategic time out (I mean, needed for the readers, not for me ) and planned of resurfacing only in June. Well, to cut a long story short, I was basically bored :P.

Much water has flown under the bridge in these 15 days - flow of water has literally happened with this cyclone originating from near Maldives and hitting our state, causing huge floods and landslides and killing more than a hundred people and still counting. But, I guess we don't need to bother cause we are over a bridge well over the troubled waters.

• I got 3 decent job offers in 4 days after a hiatus of 6 months. Does this indicate recession in India is finally coming to an end?

• And then, I got CVs mailed by random people stating that they wanted to join my company, as in the company ‘I own’. “Sir, I am looking for an urgent change”(sic) Two of these people actually have a far better profile as compared to mine and keeping in light the fact that my dad is neither an Ambani or a Birla and since I DO NOT own a company, am pretty sure I can not be of any help to these people. Well, the only purpose these mails served was that they brought me back to stark reality and made me realize – Nope, recession is still round the horizon and hasn’t been wiped out completely.

• My fervent prayers and wailings could not stop GM from filing from bankruptcy. I had been dreading this for a long long time and people around me are probably by now tired, listening to my tirades – “How could they allow GM to go waste? HOW! HOW! Isn't this insane!!!” To people who don’t know the cause of these laments – A future post should clarify your doubts and my deep love for GM.

• After more than a year, I finally went to an invitation where they served food in the old fashioned way- bringing food to your table and coaxing and cajoling you to eat more. Now, don’t call me old fashioned, but I somehow do not like the buffet dinners at invitation parties. Somehow, it is devoid of the personal touch – I do not go to invitations to watch liveried waiters adorn the back of the food table, while you serve food yourself, I go to restaurants for that. Being served food and being asked a few times- whether I am enjoying the food or not and then finally being enticed to have your favourite dish beyond your eating capacity – these are some tiny gestures which show that the host cares for you and I miss these in buffet dinners. Giving you an example how the personal touch gets retained, the person serving food did not need me to tell him that I absolutely adore this sweet item called rosogolla (someone translated this into juicy balls, though I must say, a more apt translation would be balls of steamed cottage cheese dipped in syrup). He just saw my facial expression change as I bit into the juicy rosogolla and he served me exactly 6 of them before I could even bat an eye lid. It is a different issue altogether that am cursing him now cause now I have to be off any kind of fatty food for the next week, cause am sure have had my entire quota of the week’s calorie last night.

• For an obvious reason, an irritating exclamation over-used by Aishwarya Rai in Devdas, seems quite sweet now (not because of the way she used it, but cause of the wordings of the exclamation) – though it would make me want to throw things at her, every time she used that exclamation in the movie.
• Barcelona decimated Manchester United in the UEFA Champions' League Final. It’s not that I am against Manchester United or something – just that I could not help but support a team comprising of a forward line of Messi and Henry. Finally, it is proven that Messi is indeed the best footballer on the planet. Argentina should be feeling bad for not playing him enough in 2006 and imposing too much faith on Riquelmé.
• Am living on the edge these days- had a harrowing time while on my way back from an official trip – slept for 6 hours in a span of 72 hours – sat through a 12 hours train journey and drove to office after that - caught a really bad cold and to top it off almost averted a collision with a Scorpio by God’s Grace.
• Am very sad for a particular reason. The place I live in is probably the greenest part of our city. A day after the Aila cyclone hit my city, I witnessed more than 150 trees uprooted in my locality. It was a pathetic sight. One day, these huge, green things were lively, swaying in the breeze and the very next day, there was nothing – leaves a big void in you – it is almost like losing someone close to you.
• According to the new obesity scale released by WHO, I am almost 10 Kgs over-weight. These buggers are incorrigible. After I painfully reduce my weight to conform to their earlier scale, they suddenly decide to lower the bar. Poor me, again I have to remain away from my favourite sweets and ice cream.
• Our state had a great opportunity to send the highest number of cabinet ministers to the Central Government- but too bad we lost that out to indecisiveness.
• If some of you have noticed, I got a new virtual pet :) . I have always wanted to have a real panda as a pet, but ever since I came to know that it "eats, shoots and leaves", I have been scared out of my wits and hence I settled for a virtual one.
  

I should end the post with these words which I find quite amazing – (Thanks to B for reminding these to me, it was on her status message, last time I saw her online) – “Dance like nobody's watching... Sing as if no one were listening….Dream like you will live forever...Live like you’ll die tomorrow....and Love like its never Going to Hurt...”

Things learnt over the past few months

1. Love is not just a four letter word.
2. If you want to enter into a long distance relationship, immediately consider joining a – phone company – like Vodafone or Airtel or get yourself adopted by a millionaire.
3. Remember those women whom you thought had the perfect eyebrows? Not all of them are natural, ok? They apparently get their eyebrows PLUCKED!!!! (Whatever that means, I presume something like plucking an apple off a tree or plucking feathers off a chicken)
4. If you want to enjoy the beauty of women, in general and objectively, do not enter into a relationship. ‘Cause, soon you will start finding flaws in those women, who were your Dream girls even a few days back. For example, Audrey Hepburn was too skinny, Ingrid Bergman was too tall, Smita Patil died too early, Marilyn Monroe was a blonde, Chitrangada Singh doesn’t look as vivacious off screen as she appears on screen, Deepika Padukone is too young, etc etc.
5. Do not try to hide things from your girl – she will find them anyways and if she doesn’t, she will torture you till you start regretting the moment you were born and will anyways blurt things out.
6. Do not blurt out whatever you think to her – she might make you lament over it.
7. If the last two statements seem contradictory, don’t worry, there will be loads of double standards and contradictions. Just learn to live with them and even better, try to enjoy them, like the sacrificial lamb who keeps on chewing grass (the green variety) happily till the moment it is sacrificed.
8. It is not that difficult to open up your feelings in front of someone.
9. Do not expect to hear the magic four letter word too often from her, try acting like a Bedouin in a desert – savour the occasional rain and don’t crib that you are not in Cherrapunji.
10. Whatever she owns, belongs to her, whatever you own also belongs to her. (If she swears that she has not flicked any material belongings of yours, I guess she is completely overlooking the abstract, irreplaceable varieties.)
11. When she says no, sometimes she means yes, and vice versa.
12. Always give undivided attention to her and don't crib that she is not giving it to you – if you complain she is going to kill you.
13. Don’t fret, if you suddenly realize that you are not as good a photographer as you thought yourself to be or not that smart a guy as people claim you are – it is just a natural progression.
14. People will start saying that you are becoming an ‘anti-social’ – don’t worry, they are right – but you can’t do anything about it.
15. If she is cribbing about something, maybe she is not that much bothered by it and it does not make sense to get overtly worried about it just yet – but well, try saying that to her and you have just signed your death warrant.
16. Never try to get one upon her ever, she knows your weak points – you are going to lose anyways- the earlier you learn to surrender, the better for you and you will be at peace with yourself.
17. Start working out and learning lots of stuff – she‘ll expect you to be a porter, an accountant, a cook, a financial consultant, an engineer, an electrician, a plumber, a lawyer and a mercenary – all combined into one.
18. Do not over-react or show that you are jealous if she says that she has a crush on somebody, she may just be testing you, but again- do not act too stoic, she might kill you for being that. However, as advised earlier, DO NOT EVEN TRY TO PULL THIS STUNT over her, unless you want to spend the rest of your life repenting or sipping water and liquid food through a straw.
19. If you are dating a literature student, do not try to act funny by deliberately writing wrong English – she may not see the funny side of it.
20. Gifting her a DVD of the Korean version of My Sassy Girl is a great way of committing suicide, cause after effects may not be nice - she might get new, innovative ideas :).
    
21. If she is complaining that you are not being fair or just, she basically means that you are not giving her a free reign to do whatever she wants to do.
22. It is possible to talk for 3 hours on phone followed by 5 hours of chatting over the net for one month straight at the end of which, even though she will probably be tired of your very existence, you keep on wishing that the days had more than 24 hours so that you could talk or chat for a few hours more with her.
23. Texting over phone is not that strenuous on your fingers, depending on the person you are messaging.
24. She might kill you anyways, but that does not mean you ignore what I have been blurting out for so long. Haven’t you heard this before?– Better be safe than sorry.

Kill me slowly and softly - Am in no hurry to DIE

You see that pack of Virginia killing sticks above? All you need to know about life is retained in those four walls. You will notice that one of your personalities is seduced by the illusions of grandeur - the gold packet of king size with a regal insignia, an attractive implication towards grandeur and wealth, the subtle suggestion that cigarettes are indeed your royal and loyal friends, and that, is a lie. Your other personality is trying to draw your attention to the flip side of the discussion, written in boring bold black and white, it's a statement that these neat little soldiers of death are in fact trying to kill you and that, is the truth. Oh, beauty is a beguiling call to death and i'm addicted to the sweet pitch of its siren. That that starts sweet ends bitter, and that which starts bitter ends sweet.

If Wishes were Horses...

I want to write a sonnet or at least a cento; set it into a solemn and melancholy tune, learn how to play the guitar; sit in a vast empty space resting my back against a Baobab tree- maybe on the edge of a crevice (possibly, the Grand Canyon) at dawn or dusk - facing the expanse and sing it aloud - all the while listening closely to the echo emanating from across the horizon. I want to wait for the trees and sky to droop down on me; embrace me and comfort me on my state of mind. I fancy a nightingale or a cuckoo to reciprocate my music by singing back in an even more poignant note. At this point of time, I desire to mellow down my voice reducing it to just a careless whisper and gape unabashedly (even to the extent of appearing lewd) at the beauty of this world and marvel at the spectacle called Life.

It's Election time!!!

Today, I cast vote for the first time in my life. It’s not that I had been ineligible to wield the only power provided to me by the democracy of our country earlier. Just that I did not have my election id and every time the election process happened, I was invariably outside my home town – either in Delhi, Mumbai, Bangalore, Darjeeling, Chennai – etc etc – I have indeed been a frequent flier (or, ‘rail’er?). Finally, after almost 7 years of being eligible and casually frittering away this super-power, I finally set my foot down.

There were exactly 17 candidates – only No. 2 and No. 4 being the major contenders. The others were I guess dummy or were just vying to prove their nationality in politics. The last candidate was a genuinely independent candidate, though I guess, he just filed his nomination cause he had Rs. 10,000 to spare or ‘cause he wanted his name to come out in the newspapers – or maybe he is genuinely sympathetic to the cause of the people and wanted to bring forth a change. The entire repertoire of symbols was hilarious to say the least – other than the customary national and local party symbols, there was a burning fire, a clock, an elephant, a cricket bat, a farmer and what not. I glanced through the entire list searching frantically for a particular symbol – not to vote, but to have fun. One of my friends told me that one of the independent candidates in his constituency brandished a symbol of Batman. I frantically searched for the capped crusader of Gotham City, but sigh maybe the capped crusader thought that he should give my constituency a miss – well, I guess then we do not have anyone to shield us from the antics of the Riddler or the evil of the Joker. I still did not lose hope and kept roving through the list, if not Batman, at least Superman or He-man – or at least the Wonderwoman – nope – no one – just no one – all the super heroes and heroines gave our constituency a miss. I can’t blame them; I guess they just got confused with the delimitation.

I must say, the entire hullabaloo about the indelibility of the election ink seemed completely farcical. As soon as it was applied on my finger, I just rubbed it; the ink gave way and lo and behold I was theoretically eligible for another round of voting!!! (I used Quink ink after coming back home, just to take this pic)

Jokes apart – the entire process got over in 2-3 minutes flat and I finally came out beaming – patting myself on the back for finally being able to prove my citizenship ; being able to contribute something for the cause of our nation’s democracy and also for finally being able to lose my 'poll'itcal virginity!!!

Soliloquy of a hopelessly (not haplessly) smitten guy

Ishq de gede vich giya phass ji

Gum laga dada hun kara dass ki

Ishq de gede vich giya phass ji

Gum laga dada hun kara dass ki

Teri chale marzi,

Hoyi bhool-chuk ji!

Hone geya-geya-geya mai to ji!

Mahi mennu nai karna pyar hai,

Nai karna pyar,

Rabba mai hun kara das ki!

Mahi mennu nai karna pyar hai,

Nai karna pyar,

Rabba mai hun kara das ki!

Ae mahi mennu pyar...

Feem da nasha tere naina vich ji

Sulfe di laat vaaregi tu lagdi

Feem da nasha tere naina vich ji

Sulfe di laat vaaregi tu lagdi!

Aisi tand hai tutti,

Kinnu kaiye aisi ki,

Mere reha-reha-reha duss ki!

Mahi mennu nai karna pyar hai

Nai karna pyar

Kinni kauda koti lamha hun pi

Mahi mennu nai karna pyar hai

Nai karna pyar

Kinni kauda koti lamha hun pi

Mahi mennu pyar...

Mahi mennu nai karna pyar hai

Nai karna pyar

Rabba mai hun kara das ki!

Mahi mennu nai karna pyar hai,

Nai karna pyar,

Rabba mai hun kara das ki!

Ae mahi mennu pyar...

I do not want to fall in love – Love is just too painful - it makes me too vulnerable – But the more I try to stave it off, the more it engulfs me….

Awaiting further elaborate translations...